Lost!

Cut adrift

Aimlessly floating

In an ocean

Of emotion.

Free verse poetry (which is, by the way, real poetry) is a release. For me, emotions are expressed in a variety of ways. Usually, I only allow myself to feel one emotion, happiness, and variations on that theme. However, (like in my previous post) this is primarily altruistic. When I'm by myself, sometimes I fall victim to swamps of sadness. There's a fine line between happiness and despair where I'm at my most creative. At the bottom of my swing, I'm barely functional. It's a struggle to get out of bed, because I just don't think there's any point to going on or doing anything. But the opposite isn't very helpful either. When I'm at my most happy, everything I try to write/draw/compose comes out being boring and insipid. Though I don't do it intentionally, I invariably end up on the cliff between joy and woe. That cliff is where my juices flow.

Sometimes, I can magically draw (note: usually, even my stick figures look like fail). Other times, I can write poetry that actually rhymes and has decent figurative language and such. Most of the time, it's prose or music. On a "normal" day (as normal as they get, anyway), my writing's not half bad, and I can play piano without making anyone wince. But on a good day, meaning an almost horrible day, words flow. Melodies spring forth from my fingers; I hear symphonies in everyday sounds.

I'm still not sure why this is. But it feels good to write about it. I'm in one of those downswings right now, and hopefully I won't scrape the very bottom, but I'm feeling creative right now. Which also means I don't want to do anything responsible, like homework.

Hence, blogging.